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Friday, June 26, 2015

When Death Comes

The title itself gives you an idea what I'm planning to talk about

Recently, I've been surrounded by the "death news" 
However, in most of the news, there's only one that really strike my heart like really deep within 
I can feel my heart literally being poked by the needle and trust me it really hurt 
Err, I guess I'm over exaggerating the feeling, but yeah you'll get the point right?
Straight to the point, it was about the death of one of my classmates, from the same class and I know him in person 
Masha Allah, he is one of the patience men, in spite of having some of his friends that really like to tease him, but yeah he okay with it. Hat off!

He has just gone like that *boom!
I know he was sick, but the last conversation I had with him, 
He was getting better, yet two weeks later 
I received news he has left us FOREVER
You know what is the most saddest part? 
I was thinking about at THAT moment was IF I WAS HIM, AM I READY FOR IT?

I am quite aware as a Muslim, we believed with Qada' and Qadr 
The life and the death etc. 
Yet that moment, causing me till today wonder around and monolog what am I suppose to do with my life? 
 I've been thinking a lot.. I mean like A LOT.... 
Sometimes I wonder what if like Now... this moment, I close my eyes and I was pronounced dead
What happen next?  
Yes, I'm going to leave everyone, my soul will leave my body 
And just to think about it cause my tears drop!

I realize that I'm not ready for it 
I realize that I've been spending so much time ALONE that I forgot that one day I'm going to end my life ALONE, no one is going to be there with me! 
No one's is going to hold my hand and show me to the next world 
NO ONE!!! And it's scary! 
Sometimes you wonder you've been created in this world ALONE to monitor about yourself
Surrounding you is just a tool and responding variables to see how you react to this world 
At that particular time, I know that my deeds are so small that if I throw it into the ocean, the ocean will not going to move and wavy.

Again, if you read this, don't lose faith 
Don't dare to kill yourself 
Let the death comes to you at the right time  
Yeah, I know life can be challenging, but leaving alone? 
Trust me, it's is going to be the last thing you've ever wanted to do 
Take my words from the guy who used to think that living alone is heaven!


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